I still hold on the the fantasy of "Forever" when my perception of reality is that life is a Day at a time process of commitments.
How does this affect society's "IDEAL" of marriage?
When entering into a relationship do we live in the fantasy or pledge to try?
Sunday Night October 31st episode of Brothers and Sisters was profound!
If you haven't seen it you should (nbc.com, ch131.com)!
It shows a couple who are married and are gay going through the trials of life that affect every human being regardless of what civil/religious liberties this country offers them.
Brilliant!
It also shows a women who when telling her child she was going to Marry her boyfriend was asked how long they were going to be married, and she was alarmed at this.
My personal opinion is that when your mind enters into the place where your heart takes you, It is best to ask yourself,
ESPECIALLY BEFORE YOU SAY I DO
:
1.Do I love this person whole heatedly with out fear or judgment?
2. What are my deal breakers in this relationship and do I love this person enough to work through them before we get married?
3. Have I sat down with this person and made a verbal contract/interview of what you think you want and actively listened to what they want and are you willing to give it to them even at times where you don't feel like it?
At this moment I am doing extensive work on myself so I am abstaining from active pursuit of those who give me
Butterflies Inside (M.J., RIP)
In my last two experiments (relationships) my intent was to be open and honest and to learn about my partner with out judging or putting stipulations or expectations.
In one relationship I coupled a person who never heard of anyone being open and honest and not
creating DRAMA
when something goes wrong.
In the other I had a willing participant to try and see what happens.
What I learned:
Every one comes with their own baggage and when entering into a relationship you have to check in with yourself every once in a while to make sure that your not overwhelmed with
1. Your own
2. Your Partners
3. The baggage you create together
Forever to me is until you both loose the strength to carry on.
From my last experience I gave up and I was in denial about it. I was holding on to something and working so hard to keep it that I neglected to work on my self at all.
And working on one self is the
Reality of Forever!
No for the marriage part. This concept of entering into a contract is romantic and beautiful but ask yourself Have I been here before?
And what happen and what was my part in it?
My Perception of others relationships (Including my own) is that it is hard for us to look past the pain of the end of the affair to the healing and moving forward. We are so use to cutting off the thought and memory of what did work for fear of the feelings that came from what didn't work
and we rarely acknowledge our roles in the good and bad nor are we willing to listen to exes about their perception of our part in the good or the bad
and if we did
if we were able to hear and actively listen to how our partner perceives our actions to be
would have an idea of who we are
In a relationship and compare it to who we want to be
and figure out how to get there.
Then we can commit to today
Love Ya much
How does this affect society's "IDEAL" of marriage?
When entering into a relationship do we live in the fantasy or pledge to try?
Sunday Night October 31st episode of Brothers and Sisters was profound!
If you haven't seen it you should (nbc.com, ch131.com)!
It shows a couple who are married and are gay going through the trials of life that affect every human being regardless of what civil/religious liberties this country offers them.
Brilliant!
It also shows a women who when telling her child she was going to Marry her boyfriend was asked how long they were going to be married, and she was alarmed at this.
My personal opinion is that when your mind enters into the place where your heart takes you, It is best to ask yourself,
ESPECIALLY BEFORE YOU SAY I DO
:
1.Do I love this person whole heatedly with out fear or judgment?
2. What are my deal breakers in this relationship and do I love this person enough to work through them before we get married?
3. Have I sat down with this person and made a verbal contract/interview of what you think you want and actively listened to what they want and are you willing to give it to them even at times where you don't feel like it?
At this moment I am doing extensive work on myself so I am abstaining from active pursuit of those who give me
Butterflies Inside (M.J., RIP)
In my last two experiments (relationships) my intent was to be open and honest and to learn about my partner with out judging or putting stipulations or expectations.
In one relationship I coupled a person who never heard of anyone being open and honest and not
creating DRAMA
when something goes wrong.
In the other I had a willing participant to try and see what happens.
What I learned:
Every one comes with their own baggage and when entering into a relationship you have to check in with yourself every once in a while to make sure that your not overwhelmed with
1. Your own
2. Your Partners
3. The baggage you create together
Forever to me is until you both loose the strength to carry on.
From my last experience I gave up and I was in denial about it. I was holding on to something and working so hard to keep it that I neglected to work on my self at all.
And working on one self is the
Reality of Forever!
No for the marriage part. This concept of entering into a contract is romantic and beautiful but ask yourself Have I been here before?
And what happen and what was my part in it?
My Perception of others relationships (Including my own) is that it is hard for us to look past the pain of the end of the affair to the healing and moving forward. We are so use to cutting off the thought and memory of what did work for fear of the feelings that came from what didn't work
and we rarely acknowledge our roles in the good and bad nor are we willing to listen to exes about their perception of our part in the good or the bad
and if we did
if we were able to hear and actively listen to how our partner perceives our actions to be
would have an idea of who we are
In a relationship and compare it to who we want to be
and figure out how to get there.
Then we can commit to today
Love Ya much
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